How to Be Happier
Happiness is in this moment, and this moment only. You will never be happy in the future because you will never be in the future. You are not happy in the past, because you are not in the past.
This moment has infinite potential for gratitude, creativity and love. They are the main keys to happiness.
The First Way to Happiness is Gratitude
Each moment contains infinite valid reasons for gratitude. Recognizing it is a habit. Every time you practice gratitude it becomes easier to do it again.
Conditions of Gratitude
The obstacle to gratitude is never the world or your circumstances. The obstacles are your conditions. We set up conditions for when we are allowed to feel gratitude.
“I can feel gratitude when I have a girlfriend.”
“I can feel gratitude when my car has more than 150 horsepower.”
“I can feel gratitude when I have a million dollars in my bank account”.
As you reach these goals you feel gratitude for maybe a few minutes or a few days, then you need something else to allow yourself the gift of gratitude. It never ends.
Unlocking Your Potential for Gratitude
Realize that you can feel grateful right now. You have infinite reasons to be grateful contained inside your skin. There is another infinitude of potential gratitude in the room you are in right now. Realize this and start practicing. Gratitude is a habit. Find three things you are grateful for right now.
You just fired neural pathways related to gratitude three times. Each time you triggered changes in your brain. Every single time you fire neural pathways of gratitude, you pave those pathways. It becomes easier for electricity to flow through. Practicing gratitude makes it easier, and more automatic, to practice gratitude. Choose to be grateful. Choose to be happy.
Benefits of Gratitude
Gratitude is a sure-fire method for triggering release of feel-good chemicals like dopamine. These brain chemicals, called neurotransmitters, amp up your brain. You feel better and your brain is tuned up to a higher frequency. It is easier to be creative. It is easier to love.
Learn how to stimulate release of dopamine, serotonin and other brain chemicals from our course: Control Your Brain Chemistry
The Second Way to Happiness is Creativity
Each moment contains infinite possibilities for creativity. Creativity is a powerful trigger for getting into the flow state. When you are in flow you forget all notions of time. Your brain works at its best. You feel like you could achieve anything. Your creative power is unleashed.
Creativity is a feedback loop. Creativity helps you enter flow. Flow makes you more creative.
Ask yourself, “What do I desire?”
In the words of Alan Watts, “What would you do if money was no object?”
The world is longing for your art. The world is longing for you to change it. Art can take many forms.
Work on your projects. Live your dream in this moment. Practice music. Improve your work situation.
Improve on anything. Learn about the world and about yourself. Creativity and learning walks hand in hand.
Continuously challenge yourself. Be creative on the edge of your current abilities.
What is the most important thing you can create for the world?
And love the creative work you do unconditionally.
Learn how to enter flow and learn faster in Primal Learning.
The Third Way to Happiness is Love
Love is a verb. To love. Love is something you do. Desire, pride and joy are some of the feelings that can accompany love. Our society tells a story of love being intense emotions. But our emotions fluctuate. If our emotions decide how we act, we will only love when we feel good.
Your fickle emotions lead you astray, but love is always available. You can practice love even if you don’t feel like it. Let love decide and realize that the emotions follow. When you love, no matter how you feel, you start feeling better. You start feeling those feelings that accompany love.
If you seek love, you lose love. If you give love you receive love.
Related reading: 1 Simple Act that Fills Your Life with Love
“I love him when he sings.”
“I go over and kiss her when I feel good.”
“I love myself when I perform admirably.”
You block yourself from love when you set up conditions. Each moment contains the potential for love, regardless of your feelings or external circumstances. You can kiss her even though you feel bad. You can love yourself all the time, unconditionally.
Unconditional love of Others
When you remove the judgment, love takes its place. We continuously judge what others do as good or bad. When we remove all judgments, we can be fully present in the moment with that other person. Acts of love flow effortlessly out of that state of non-judgment.
Making judgments is a habit. We have done it our whole lives, cementing the neural pathways of judgment. To reach the state of non-judgment you practice letting go of judgments as they arrive. Replace them with acts of love.
Unconditional Love of Self
Everything above applies to love of self. We have a habit of judging ourselves. Self-judgment creates a distortion between reality and our concept of self. We start suppressing parts of ourselves.
The most common condition for self-love is that others must love us first. When others do not like us we feel deep shame and judge ourselves.
Realize that you need no reason to love yourself. You are worthy of your own love right now. You will never be more worthy and you have never been more worthy. When you love yourself unconditionally you become free to be you. There are no longer any conditions for love, so you can be true to yourself.
Self-love is also a habit, as is self-judgment. Let go of the judgment and love takes its place. Every time you catch yourself judging yourself, let go and make a decision to love yourself.
The way to love yourself is to practice gratitude, creativity and love.
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